What I should be doing right now is finishing a paper for my economics course. But for some reason the economic impact of recycling is just not finding itself transferring from my brain to my word document. I’ll try again later.

In the meantime, I still feel like writing, and being in a creative frame of mind I was hunting up a quick topic. As things would have it, the perfect topic is hogging my mouse pad as I type. Chernobyll who is the usual source of the phrase “Eww What stinks” is hiding from Rajah, better known as the nominally famous Hellcat. Yep, for lack of a better topic, I will be writing on what I have now dubbed the Four Felines of the Apocalypse, or FFA for short.

Why give my cats a label best suited to doomsday scenarios? Well if you’ve ever spent time at my house you’d understand. Just as the unholy horsemen from the book of Revelations have their particular jobs to do to usher in the end of the world as we know it, these smaller version also have their own unholy missions, either to destroy my house or what remains of my sanity. Their Apocalyptic names are Sheddomatic, Poopsalot, Destruction and Destruction Light.

Lunatic’s job is to be the great and terrible shedder of her beautiful and adherent  fur. Her mission is to turn the world as white as she is. As she is the oldest and least agile, she is best suited for this task. All she needs to do is nap where a human is likely to pass. Even if its just for a second, her fur will nearly leap off her body and onto your clothing. The speed of that transfer is faster if your pants are black.

Chernobyll being the neurotic wuss that she is, has the job of reminding me that the world is a litterbox…literally. When she isn’t hiding, or blocking my view of anything on my desk, she is digesting what kibbles she’s managed to steal when Hellcat wasn’t looking. Hellcat who is the bane of her existence helps keep her neurosis sharp and ready for a new reminder.

Rajah, aka Hellcat, is of course the chief destroyer, stealer of drinking straws and remover of any small objects from my desk. He is also the head of this quartet having bullied himself into the top cat position. He is also the fattest  of the group, being the  prime guardcat at the food bowl. No kibble gets nibbled without his knowledge, well, unless he’s sleeping, or chewing a drinking straw.

Miko, the mini me to Rajah’s Dr. Evil’s persona is Rajah’s happy little shadow. Whatever Rajah does, she either is assisting with or is providing adorable diversions so that the  human in the house (mainly me) doesn’t immediately see whatever he is currently up to. Her favorite thing to steal are pony tail holders and bobby pins. As I have long hair, she has plenty of access.

Rajah and Miko who are the youngest are still in high energy mode, I keep hoping for the day when they slow down to Lunatic’s slug-like pace. Having the FFA around does sometimes makes me wonder if I can expect plagues or locusts in my near future.



2 Replies to “The FFA”

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